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Names - MegaZone's Safety Valve
The Ramblings of a Damaged Mind
zonereyrie
zonereyrie
Names
I suck with names - a lot. Really, if you observed me you'd notice I rarely call someone by name unless I know them well. Sometimes I even forget the names of long time friends. So someone I see now and then will come up and say "Hey MegaZone, how's it going?" and I'll be like "Oh, hey, nice to see you..." Never mentioning their name. Meanwhile, internally, I'm going "Shit shit shit, I know this person, I recognize them, what the fuck is their name?!?!"

But I also do this with memories - people i haven't seen in a while lose their names in my memories. I'll remember a face, etc, but no longer their name. This is especially frustrating with old lovers and gfs, since it was drilled into my head at some point that only a complete cad forgets the name of an old gf. I can't remember the names of *most* of the women I've gone out with over the years. Sure, I remember the name of my stalker (Barbara), my first gf (the pyscho) (Rebecca), and the one gf who ended up wanting to burn me - in effigy or at the stake, I don't think she was picky (Andrea). But there are a number who are nameless now. I really wish I could remember the name of the cool woman I met in the pub in Hamburg, or the other cool woman who let me crash on her floor while I was there. This drives me nuts when I go to cons and tradeshows too, since people come up to me with "Hey, we met at the last FuCon, remember?" Yeah, I probably do - except that if I only heard your name once in passing at a con I will NEVER remember it the next time we meet. I'm always afraid I'm going to offend someone because I don't remember their name, or that they'll think I'm arrogant and didn't deem it worth remembering or something. Especially since I have such a unique name and it seems like no one every forgets it.

(Memo to self - the girl who went skinny dipping with you, Ani, and Goatboy was Abby - you keep forgetting that!)

I am: frustrated frustrated
Current Media: Cowboy Bebop: Music for Freelance - Piano Black (Ian O'Brien

6 STDOUT || STDIN
Comments
rhysara From: rhysara Date: November 21st, 2003 10:02 pm (UTC) (Direct Link)
I recently made a vow that when I couldn't remember someone's name (at school) I would just continue to ask until I remembered. The first person I enacted this rule on turned out to be the headmaster who didn't appear pleased to not be known. I abandoned my rule immediately.
From: iwascaite Date: November 21st, 2003 11:14 pm (UTC) (Direct Link)
I keep reading sex scenes where people call out their lover's name. I cannot imagine that really happening.

If I were not in a long term relationship, I probably would remember the wrong name--- doesn't that win some award for lameness? I usually flinch when someone says my name since I almost never hear it, so I am sure to be uncomfortable if someone calls my name. Everyone I have ever even dated was geekier than I am (the whole anti-name thing seems to bind with geekiness), I assume everyone feels uncomfortable when their names are used. Which is just not the effect you would want in bed.

I think I could probably manage to use someone's name at the height of passion, but I would definitely have to stop what I was doing and think about it.
donnerjack From: donnerjack Date: November 21st, 2003 11:49 pm (UTC) (Direct Link)
Oh yeah, flaunt the whole "I went skinny dipping with Ani" thing some more why don't you. Bastard. ;)
riki_hime From: riki_hime Date: November 22nd, 2003 12:04 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
I usually remember people by the things they do

"Hey mr. don't tip"
"Your turn mr.cheater"

or by their nick name, which is why to this day I still call some of the AOD people by the nicks from like 4 years ago.
It bugs me when people call me Mill-Chan

I HATE MILL!
Well don't hate.. but don't like either :)
sauergeek From: sauergeek Date: November 22nd, 2003 12:36 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
I'll be like "Oh, hey, nice to see you..." Never mentioning their name. Meanwhile, internally, I'm going "Shit shit shit, I know this person, I recognize them, what the fuck is their name?!?!"

I do this all the time. Mostly it covers. I have been caught red-handed (handed? whatever) at this though. My response has been to try to make a point of remembering names -- usually by repeating them to myself while looking at the person until I'm fairly confident about remembering them.
stormcrow42 From: stormcrow42 Date: November 22nd, 2003 02:10 pm (UTC) (Direct Link)

BBS/Internet names

I seem to have very little problem remembering the BBS/IRC/M*/Internet names of people, but I can almost never remember the "real" name of people I don't see/speak to often, unless I've been reminded of their name 5 or 6 times. I guess for me it's easier to remember a name I've read instead of one told to me. The "handles" seem to stick in my memory longer too, so if I run into them after quite some time, their old BBS handle will come into my mind more readily than their name.
6 STDOUT || STDIN