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Someday I'll learn... - MegaZone's Safety Valve — LiveJournal
The Ramblings of a Damaged Mind
Someday I'll learn...
Oh, I did it again. I was. well, am, interested in someone, but she was seeing someone else. I don't play that game, so I kept back. Then they broke up and she didn't seem interested in any relationship at the time, and there is distance and that relationship was an LDR and she seemed to be against every doing an LDR again. So I convinced myself that there was no point in saying anything, and she probably wouldn't be interested anyway, etc, etc. And I like her and didn't want to risk our friendship on a pointless play for something more.

So she meets someone else, another LDR, and she's seems happy. We were chatting and I made a crack about being jealous - which I am. Then I had to explain why - long story short, I should've said something when I had the chance, she wouldn't have said no.

I really have to stop doing that. Really.

I am: depressed depressed
Current Media: The Cure: Fascination Street

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zonereyrie From: zonereyrie Date: December 29th, 2004 01:07 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
You think I'd've learned this lesson by now. This is hardly the first time I either missed completely that someone was interested in me, or that I convinced myself that they weren't and there was no point in getting rejected and/or risking what we did have - only to find out, too late, that I should've said something.

It is a bad habit that I always notice too late.
(Deleted comment)
zonereyrie From: zonereyrie Date: December 29th, 2004 01:24 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
I've seen unwanted approaches trash friendships. Some people don't cope well knowing that their 'friend' is romantically interested in them. I've had it make friendships awkward in the past myself. So sometimes I just convince myself they're not interested anyway, so no point in risking anything.
z_gryphon From: z_gryphon Date: December 29th, 2004 03:06 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
Sometimes you do. Oh yeah.
lizzielizzie From: lizzielizzie Date: December 29th, 2004 01:18 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
you can always say, "Well, if you're interested, so am I." It worked on me once. :-)
zonereyrie From: zonereyrie Date: December 29th, 2004 01:25 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
Yeah, I could've said a lot of things - I didn't. My fault completely for blowing the chance when I had it. I'm just kicking myself. I find it very easy to convince myself that no one could possibly be interested in me.
reddragdiva From: reddragdiva Date: December 29th, 2004 01:42 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
Yep. One thing I finally learnt in my 30s is ALWAYS say when I'm interested, even if nothing is on the cards.
ardaniel From: ardaniel Date: December 29th, 2004 05:25 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
It took a considerable mess for me to tell wedgex where I was at wrt interest in him.

I do not regret it. I also, though, don't expect to ever be in that sort of a considerable mess of attraction and other major life issues again.

Plus, nothing is certain in this life anyhow, so who knows where all concerned will end up. Not wishing ill on the lady in question or her current SO, just making the general observation about the chaos factor. :)
zonereyrie From: zonereyrie Date: December 29th, 2004 05:42 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
Yeah, I'm sure you know who it is.
ardaniel From: ardaniel Date: December 29th, 2004 07:06 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
Yeah, I'm sure I do too. Not rocket science there.
dreamweavergirl From: dreamweavergirl Date: December 29th, 2004 10:44 am (UTC) (Direct Link)
I agree with artemisia, however I do see where you're comin from, and I've been in your situation myself, and it really sucks, but sometimes I guess you just have to take the risk of losing a little before losing it all.